Monday, April 25, 2011

I MISS MY BLOG!!!


I have had NO time to blog lately and that makes me sad.

A fun photo I found today via Green Wedding Shoes - my favorite wedding blog.


Monday, April 4, 2011

Please send $3,750.00

I need to own these. I would wear them EVERYDAY!
I promise.

Saturday, April 2, 2011

T-A-L-E-N-T



Let's talk about talent. Amazing talent. We all have talent but some people have extraordinary talent. I find it fascinating.

This past Wednesday night our dear friend J. Brooks invited us to attend a concert hosted by the Carnegie Hall Notables, a wonderful organization within the patrons of Carnegie Hall for supporters in their 20s and 30s. From their website:

"The Carnegie Hall Notables is a membership and ticket program specifically created for music enthusiasts in their 20s and 30s. The Notables program celebrates music through intimate discussions with musicians, concerts, private performances, and exclusive Notables-only social gatherings."

The concert we attended was a piano concert by Alexander Romanovsky, born in 1984. I can't seem to locate his exact birth date but needless to say, he is younger than me! He played three pieces and closed with an encore of a piece by Chopin. I will have to look for all the paperwork to outline what exactly he played, but it was breathtaking.


Throughout his performance I was enraptured by his hands - his loooonnnnnngggg fingers moving like lightening across the keys. It was truly astonishing. He played everything by memory which is the standard I am sure, but it was mind-boggling.


As I was watching and listening to him I was thinking about talent and taken back to the college classroom discussions of Nature vs. Nurture - one of the fundamental considerations for a psych major. How much of this talent was he born with and how much is the result of relentless training and sacrifice? Was he born with those long pianist's hands, or have they evolved or grown in response to his lifelong dedication to the piano?

I recently read the book, Battle Hymn of a Tiger Mother by Amy Chua which has received a tremendous amount of attention, as it discusses the "Chinese" way of parenting, the stereotypical hard-edged, drill-sargent style that arguably produces the extreme talents of any given generation. Chua is the first to admit that the "Chinese" way of parenting is not exclusive to the Chinese, that it is present across all ethinicities and cultures. We have all heard the stories of the gymnasts, models, ice skaters, performers, etc. who are driven by parents or coaches from such an early age (a time at which they are not able to make their own decisions) into a life that is so utterly consumed by their talent that nothing else exists for them. However, when I watched Romanovsky perform I could not deny that he clearly had a God-given talent - what is the equation? I am so curious (nosey?) to know what his life is like? Did he attend "normal" school, have normal relationships and interactions? Or was his childhood and adolescence one long affair with the piano? I would love to know if these great talents think all of the sacrifice was worth it? I am sure it is fun now - fame, fortune, adoration, travel- but is it worth it?

Chua says in an article in the Wall Street Journal,

"What Chinese parents understand is that nothing is fun until you're good at it. To get good at anything you have to work, and children on their own never want to work, which is why it is crucial to override their preferences. This often requires fortitude on the part of the parents because the child will resist; things are always hardest at the beginning, which is where Western parents tend to give up. But if done properly, the Chinese strategy produces a virtuous circle. Tenacious practice, practice, practice is crucial for excellence; rote repetition is underrated in America. Once a child starts to excel at something—whether it's math, piano, pitching or ballet—he or she gets praise, admiration and satisfaction. This builds confidence and makes the once not-fun activity fun. This in turn makes it easier for the parent to get the child to work even more."

I am really not moving toward any sort of resolution of this question but am more just pondering/rambling about this as it has been on my mind since Wednesday. Luckily I am not having to make decisions at the moment about parenting but that challenge does loom in the future. Will I know if my child is born with a great talent? Will I know how hard to push them in order to have them achieve their highest potential? Will I know when to push, and when to let up? When is quitting OK? When is the pressure too much?

When I watch someone like Romanovsky perform for a moment I am overcome with admiration that borders on jealousy...how I wish I could play more than chopsticks on the piano, how wonderful would it be to travel the world performing for enraptured audiences, what would it be like to go to be at night and wake up in the morning knowing you are one of the greatest talents of your generation?...but then I am reminded by logic all of the aspects of my life I would have sacrificed in order to even strive for such greatness...my summers spent at Camp Mystic, the countless sleepovers I had with my beloved girlfriends that I still adore to this day, the time spent lounging by the pool, skiing (which many athletes and performers are not permitted to do for fear of injury), scuba diving, horse back riding, reading, spending time with family...the list goes on and on.

In another notable book, Outliers, by Malcom Gladwell, the author has an entire chapter dedicated to the 10,000 Hours Rule:

"Gladwell repeatedly mentions the "10,000-Hour Rule", claiming that the key to success in any field is, to a large extent, a matter of practicing a specific task for a total of around 10,000 hours." (from wikipedia)

10,000 hours is more than a year...I don't know about you but there is not a year's worth of time I would be willing to give up from my 27 years thus far. But, as I look towards the future and a day in which I will hopefully parent my own flock, I remain fascinated by this balance - talent vs. hard work - nature vs. nurture...how do you find that balance?